Death By Peas
“Dear coworker, when you said that you where gonna motivate us by playing music I didn’t know Black Eye Peas was ur weapon of choice. I want to burn ur cubicle.”
-Mav
Posted in Mav, More Whores and tagged black eyed peas, mav
Give Us Free
“They turned the ac off at work to give it that authentic southern plantation feel.”
-Mav
Posted in Mav, More Whores
A Librarian’s Burden
I haven’t updated my journal in about 6 months, which is inexcusable. Not much I can do about that, though, since i’m unemployed. I did come up with an idea, however – I can live vicariously through the bullshit that my wife and friends have to put up with at their jobs.
My wife is a librarian, and contrary to the classic stereotypes of that profession, she’s not an ankle-length skirt wearing, horn-rimmed glasses sporting, white-haired old woman. She’s in her early 30′s but still acts like a teenager at times. For the last couple of years she’s been working in a library on the “good” side of town. With a recent promotion, she got transferred to the “hood”, in a branch that had a lot of “developmental opportunity”.
I get good stories every day, so i’ll start to share them as soon as I get them. Today’s story concerns one of the many bad-ass kids that she kicks out of the library on a daily basis. It’s amazing to hear about so many poorly parented children being turned loose into the wild.
So this boy, about 12 or 13 tears old, is sitting at one of the public computers, leaning back with his feet on the desk. My wife walks by and asks him to put his feet down.
“Aw, Miss… that’s bullshit!”
“I’m sorry?”
“I mean, that’s messed up.”
(He still hasn’t taken his feet down.)
“You can either take your feet down or leave.”
“I ain’t gotta go nowhere, Miss.”
“Why is that?”
“‘Cause i’m a gangsta.”
(Pause)
(Pause)
(Pause)
(Wait for it.)
“So you’re a gangster… in a library?”
“Huh?”
Needless to say, he put his feet down.
Posted in More Whores